Friday, June 08, 2012

'Simmering-release' - interesting lateral thinking

Good morning. How was your rest? Starting the day refreshed, with new energy? Sounds good.
Me, well, don't know yet, this 'slow-day' yesterday felt very nice, it let the 'simmering-release-process' run full blast and I am still in that state. Some might ask themselves how this process works. Well, hard to explain, it's like this:

I read, hear some or a thought just pops up into my consciousness. I am getting aware of  a fact and then I start wondering. Because it rings a bell, this 'curious-me-inside' alias soul is curious. Adventuring life and its beauty.

So, for expample this morning, I read on my calendar a quote with the main message, saying, when you are happy, not a lot of people can relate with you, it seperates you from them and when you are sad you make bondages with others because they are in the same 'condition' and can relate. So - now this soul comes in..poking this 'simmering-release-activity', because there is something inside that can relate or it is a part of my 'unanswered-pilgrim-questions'. But concerning the quote, further insights appear, it's like upcircling, LOL.....and from there it usually goes further:

Going back to the example, the next step: 'brain-is-on-background-search-without-direct-thinking-on-it' to compare with expierences I made. And then, JACKPOT, some expierence makes sense now. And usually it is not just one expierence of the same kind, but a couple and than, this release happens. Beep blink beep blink....usually during 'routine-houshold-challenges'. LOL....And with this message of the quote, I made my expierences already. It's not easy to share joy whenever you want, it makes people suspicious, not all, but a lot. It is hard for them to relate, so it is hard to join me with sharing 'good-cheery-vibes-just-because' and no agenda behind. Just because I want to give. Well, maybe even envy.
But honestly, there is no reason to be jealous or suspicious, because going this way towards joy is not easy, it's actually hard work. Going through a lot of 'neutral-phases' which are unfortunately not neutral or 'feeling-edges-all-over' because you are not trusted that you just want to share some fun and 'sunny-vibes'. And all without any substances, because I do not drink, at all. YEP. Now you know. The world is too beautiful to 'fog-it-up'. ( EY! 'piratess-spoke-in-between'. ) Oh and not to forget this 'unanswered-questions' you live with, for quite some time before - maybe the answer finds you. LOL. SO - yes, sometimes it's frustrating being alone with your joy and 'sunny-vibes' even I have my blog for everyday sharing and some friends for once in a while sharing. LOL-no this is not meant as 'self-pitty'. But back to the point. Continuing this 'up-circling' - (Integrating the 'up-to-date-topic' alias 'chapter-title' in 'simmering-release-process' alias 'lateral-thinking').
It's clearing the facts - too honest probably, for some. But that is just me. POKING. Brave subject, risking potential more enemies, LOL....but it's a part of 'keeping-it-simple'.  Because I would like to 'keep-it-simple-with-sharing-my-joy'  but things can get complicated if you just do, full blast whirlwinding around. Lot's of misunderstandings can happen.

And out of this simmering, the 'lateral-thinking-process' connects to another fact, towards making sense:

So, like everything in life, there are two sides of a coin and the last months, I am getting more and more aware of them, or I view it from all angles before some matters get shared. And seeing both sides, is a challenge to find a way. Because you can't really make a decision without risking the other side of coin becoming reality. Like being too honest. (just wanted to be open with somebody all the way- because honesty is important to me) Being aware of facts and you want to share them. Either the other appreciates the honesty and is aware of it as well or the other is so scared of it and distrust your 'honesty-as-a-agenda-behind-plan' or feels controlled. And you can imagine the end reaction will be totally different.

So, viewing back and comparing with my expierences. Maybe - when I would have had this understanding a half year ago, things would have went different, but on the other hand, everything has its purpose and it is the experience you learn out of. So, yes I take full responsibility for my actions, I am aware there happened mistakes or misunderstandings which I can not clear and accept that fact, I learned out of it. For my further ways. And since seeing both sides is now kind of unavoidable with this understandings and 'connecting-lateral-thinking', following my heart and soul, gets even more important. Because those are the indicators, if I am going to live being me or not. They will tell me. And I will listen, even the way, they lead me, is at first quite a challenge and a lot of stones are in the way, but you can create something with those stones, it is the question what you make out of it, with it, not against it.

PUH....brain was smoking, not easy this morning to put this into a 'understand-able-text'. LOL......'weird-wired-me'.

Off to get going...and wishing you a great friday!

Smiles, Anke :)

That's how wild a 'neutral-phase' can be. 
LOL - and even this is not a matter to LOL.
Because it is no fun when you are in there,  
but so feeling good,  
when you made it through there. 

And it's the same thing with this, than with the unanswered question.
It's the challenge to live everything else and not get stuck.

PS from after lunch: Enough 'simmering' for today. 'piratess-and-soul-want-to-lift-off', who is with me?
Ready to spread your wings? Okay, time to stop condemning yourself and have some fun, let's enjoy to 'sail-through-the-air'. READY? LET'S LIFT

eeeeeeehhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh we are FLYING  


And here today's papers headlines...arranged. ;) reading material ARRIVED.....hip hip hooray!!!!! :)))))) 

'Simmering-release-food' or 'making-the-soul-wide-nourishment' = inspiration

And yes, this development is kind of a 'luxury' but this is what I can make out of what I have.  

'It's not about what you don't have, it's about what you have and what you can make out of it.' 
LOL....quoting myself again, LOL......EY! Yes I find that funny. ;) oh my, this humor of mine ;)

PPS: DEAR BIKE.....I think the time is ready sooner than later.......'restless-legs' LOL.......let's see when I find time, to give my dear bike a 'freedom-ride'...eeeeehhhhhaaaaa.........

WOW...this 'empathizing-thing' amazes me every time....even this 'sensitiv-sensing' is a lot of time quite a challenge, especially with all those 'negative-vibes' floating around. That's why this 'inspiring-space' was so special. It felt so light and clear. WIDE. ENJOYABLE
And that's why I enjoy being in is 'vibe-free'.....and my 'sensitive-sense-can-recover'....insight released.  Smile :)

THANK YOU AGAIN. I was able to experience this space, for this gift.

EY. I guess 'simmering-release' was still on. LOL.... 
OKAY - 'simmering-release' is definitely not off...sigh....and another major insight.

OKAY - deep breath. Short form:

Soul found an amazing space to fly - empathizing sense a space to 'feel-comfi' -  but this space is not accessable anymore, dealing with this 'insight' is a challenge, because soul knows this is something unique, you are not finding in your life a lot. So, soul is sometimes longing, yes, for this amazing space and now I know why.....because it was so 'wide-clear-soul-sensitive-empathizing-sense-friendly'. 
I need my bike...i need my bike, I need my bike, life....yes you are a challenge!!!!!! 
And I still can LOL...;) 

PS from the later afternoon: A HUGE SIGH - YES THIS GOOD - SOUL FLYING WITH THE WIND - BEING MOVEMENT - taking my bike out for a FREEDOM ride. Feels soooooo 'd**n-good' after not riding for three weeks. Fullfilled - yes I do have other spaces as well for my soul but this one I mentioned earlier was something unique. Fullstop. And an 'one-eye-blinking' EY!
Want some of my sparkles? Or a 'mischievious-pirates-smirk'? YES...well here you go CATCH!!!! :)

Probably off, for the night, well...we will see. Anyway, enjoy your evening, weekend start and for those soccer fans out there - HAVE FUN WATCHING THE FIRST GAMES. 

See yaaaa.....smiles, Anke :)  

DEAR BIKE - THANK YOU.....♥♥♥♥♥ - yes that good...THAT GOOD.  
Goofy me - loves to be 

Last PS: I need some good music NOW.
And so thankful that I am an introvert.
Just because.
Life is a constant challenge.
in close by 'misery-storm-areas'.
And yes - this 'sensing' of something usually is right.
A little scary and somehow already used to it.
And another question is keeping soul busy.
Maybe I will release it - maybe not.
We will see.
Life in its full spectrum of fullfilled-unfullfilled.
Able to relate but not able to reach.
I do face this situation quite some time in life, LOL.
But everybody has to find her/his own way in life.
You can be a support for somebody, when you are wanted as a support, 
but the way towards joy, has to be found alone.
 And that's why I am so thankful for being mostly introverted.
It makes things easier.
My own personal expierence.
PPS: All I say is 'judging' and 'condemming' yourself.
Not easy  to get out of this cycle,  'self-harming', but how to explain, if the other is not open for it?
Just let the storm pass and still go the way of my soul and heart.
Even it hurts to see, but I know from my own expierence, you are first open when the time is ripe.

So, giving space - accepted space - even the other can not really accept it, maybe someday that someone will be able to again.

Off to enjoy music, something to eat and the evening sun.

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